Duvet Covers and Post Apocalyptic Football Stadia
February 28, 2010 2 Comments
Question of the Day: How is it possible that an intelligent man, highly educated in the physical sciences, is completely incapable of hanging a duvet cover over a washing line? No, it doesn’t make sense to me either. I’m staring out of the patio windows and weeping at my own ineptitude. Does anybody know of any washing line based courses that I can go on?
Anyway, I’ve gone a whole two days without posting and it feels like a lifetime. Of course, it doesn’t actually feel like a lifetime, but a nice bit of hyperbole jazzes up any situation. Two days is definitely long enough for me to feel the pull of ‘can’t be arsedness’, so it was important for me to post today.
Under normal circumstances, I would have done some kind of post about Liverpool’s match on Thursday. However, I’ve decided to end the madness of writing about football matches that I’ve not even seen. It can’t be healthy. All I will say is that I’ve gotten over being in the Europa League, but having a match kick-off at 6pm and shown on ESPN is positively uncouth.
One football match that I did watch was yesterday’s League One game between Oldham and Norwich (I was in the Norwich end). In the absence of a match report, I will share with you the following things that I learnt:
- Oldham is infeasibly cold. It must be dragging the average temperature of the country down by at least 5 degrees.
- Oldham’s Boundary Park looks like a nuclear wasteland and should be hired out to Hollywood producers as the set for any upcoming post-apocalyptic thrillers.
- League One football is so heartbreakingly real that it is the sporting equivalent of a kitchen-sink drama.
Anyway, Liverpool are playing this afternoon and it’s not on the telly. This leaves me wondering if I should try and get an internet stream or if I should do something productive instead. Answers on a postcard please.
UPDATE:
Before I had chance to publish this post, I was visited by my Gran, my brother and my nephew. They are a trio that are easily capable of filling anyone’s afternoon. Luckily, Liverpool won anyway.
About sherby57
From what I have learnt, the hadron collider in Cern – and the ultimate goal of discovering Higgs Bosun – is actually trying to understand how duvets work and how to hang them so they don’t tangle. And also to figure out out to fold fitted sheets (the ones with elastic) so that they don’t look they were folded in the dark with one hand tied behind your back.
I really should have paid more attention in lectures, but all that high energy physics stuff really used to do my head in. It’s quite a surprise to find out that it was all to do with duvets, one of my favourite subjects. If I had known this at the time then I may have stayed to to a Ph.D. Some of these lecturers really need to think about what message they’re actually sending out to their students.