All I Really Want is a Camera in my Gullet

Yesterday I had to go to the hospital for endoscopy\a camera down my throat (don’t worry, gravy fans, it turned out to just be a hiatus hernia).  Anyway, you have two options for the procedure; a ‘throat spray’ or sedation.  With the throat spray you’re allowed to leave straight afterwards; with sedation you’re not allowed to drive or be alone for 24 hours.  I was semi-tempted to go for the spray, but, once I was there, I chickened out and went for the sedation.

My advice: don’t bother.  The sedative was injected through my hand and I was lay there waiting for it to kick in.  After a minute or two the doctor told me that I should be feeling dozy; I wasn’t.  He started anyway.  If you imagine that you have to swallow a garden hose all the way down to your duodenum, then that’s exactly what happens.  It’s both as horrible as it sounds and not that bad, in equal measure.  The worst bit is getting the initial part of the camera past your throat, as you literally have to swallow it down.  Once you’ve done that, you just need to cope with the occasional gagging and the odd sensation that someone has a camera inside you.  It’s not at all painful.  It’s definitely odd though.  The whole procedure only takes about 10 minutes and then you’re fine.

I then had to ‘rest’ for an hour, even though the sedation had no effect, and had to stay with my folks over night.  This meant I had to endure the horror of not having full control of the television remote.  That was more harrowing than the camera.

P.s.

The doctors and nurses were all lovely.  Don’t slag them off.