Meet Team Extreme: Part 2
October 27, 2009 22 Comments
Last time we met POB, Hitchers, JLS and Goot, are you ready to now meet the rest of the team? I sure hope so, because we’re going to meet them anyway.

Code Name: Eed
Special Ability: Can eat crayons
Anytime you need to swing by Woolston, say hello to Eed. He stands alone in his watchtower, ensuring peace is maintained throughout the land. Except for when he isn’t there, of course. He maintains all communications for Team Extreme.

Code Name: Webbo
Special Ability: Plays the psychic washboard
Along with Goot, Webbo forms the pony-tailed contingent of the team. When under immense pressure, they can synchronise their pony-swings to form a devastating attack.

Code Name: Theo
Special Ability: Electric Boogaloo
With an incisive mind and deadly vegetables, Theo is the team’s natural assassin. Please don’t confuse him with Theo Huxtable from The Cosby Show; it makes him very angry.

Code Name: Cozzy
Special Ability: Sexual Chocolate
With a cheeky grin and a erotic caravan, Cozzy is the team’s charmer and sexual distributor. Contrary to the portrait above, he is actually Caucasian; I apologize for any confusion caused by my artistic ineptitude.
BONUS MATERIAL:
Since I already published my portrait, I wasn’t going to include myself in this list, then I realised that this was wrong. I’m a key member of Team Extreme and so I should be here. As a treat, I’ve done another portrait of myself, in one of my many chameleon-like disguises.

Code Name: Big Poppa P
Special Ability: Too many to mention, but, if I had to pick, an exceptionally fulfilling lover.
With the strength of ten men and the intelligence of fifty, Big Poppa P is the lynch-pin to the success of Team Extreme. Some critics have suggested that I’m taking advantage of my position as writer of this post to unfairly ‘big myself up’. Those people are idiots; I really am that damned good.
So, now you’ve met the whole of Team Extreme, and you’re probably feeling a little sad that there is no more to come. Well, don’t panic, my friends, stay tuned for some of the other characters that inhabit the wonderful, wild world of Team Extreme.

awesomesauce
If anybody has any questions for a Team Extreme member then please leave them here and I’ll try and get them to respond in person.
I’ll start the ball rolling by asking Goot, what does it feel like to have an evil twin?
Is there anything they can’t do?
Hmmm, that’s a deeply philosophical question.
Personally, my limitations are that I have no limitations. It’s quite a burden being so…excellent.
If any Team Extreme members are reading, what can’t you do?
i wish i was in team extreme. I’m only in Team Underwhelm and Team Sexual Voodoo. Oh and team chaka demus.
Gosh….I didn’t realise you were a member of Team Sexual Voodoo, doc. You guys are legends in the sort of black-ops circles that I move in. I believe you guys were responsible for Kerry Katona winning ‘I’m a Celebrity..’
I think I should be an honourary memeber of team extreme, given that I am your fight club style female, fiendishly attractive alter ego. I am also quite Extreme, not in a wee-on-someone’s-leg-for-kicks way. no. more in a nuno bettencourt, more than words, lighters-aloft, terminator 2 kind of way.
Doc, you are certainly more than qualified to be an honourary member of TE and to become our ‘cheerleader’, so to speak. Of course, for you to be officially indoctrinated I would have to complete a portrait of your lovely visage.
would that then be proof that we are not one and the same?
It would certainly be a gesture towards me finally believing that you’re not one of my multiple personalities.
I believe you already possess a dossier of photographs of my coutenance?
Is this a coded way of saying that I already have photos of myself?
I’m sure you’ve had your detectives following me into my local branch of Patronising Bank PLC. Saving has never been so smug.
This is true, but my detectives have been concentrating on obtaining ‘upskirt’ photos and so we have none of your face.
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I read my comments on this post and congratulated myself on my amusing quips.
Nothing denotes the presence of comedy genius than finding your own quips to be of a magnificently high standard. You are in a different league, dear doctor.
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