9 Feb
This is our milk. Respect our choices, OK?
Sometimes, when you have to write a milk bottle label in a hurry, you can’t find a post-it note and so you have to scribble something quickly onto the side of the bottle using a marker pen. This generally leads to unsatisfactory results. Ho-hum.
This post was sponsored by the Milk Bottle Manifesto.
8 Feb
It’s that time of the week again, where I shamelessly plug my other blog. I’ve continued my trend of not posting every single day, which means there is less stuff to read, but it does increase the chances of me staying sane. Enjoy.
Sunday 31st
Sparrows – A Poem – A fitting poetic tribute to the sparrow, the loveliest of all birds. And it’s got the nicest hair.
Monday 1st
The Weirdest Sensation – News of a recently formed charity that is committed to fighting one of the most tragic social-ills facing the world today.
Wednesday 3rd
Fringe Benefits – A story about how a glamourous woman has issues with a wayward fringe. It’s happened to all of us, but it’s how you deal with it that matters.
Thursday 4th
Post From The Past – February 2009 – There’s no posts to countdown this month and so I’ve tried to explain why there were no posts, instead. It’s pretty cosmic, man.
Saturday 6th
Some Hilarious Jokes – Be VERY careful when you read these jokes. They are so immensely funny that your sides may actually split.
7 Feb
I made a big point of saying that I don’t like jokes in last week’s write-up of the Jimmy Carr gig that I went to see, so you may find it surprising to find out that I went to watch Tim Vine on Friday. I should probably clarify my position: I don’t really like the sort of jokes that people tell you in the office, or that you find in ‘lads’ mags’, but I do love stupid jokes – this can be evidenced by my penchant for telling them, here. Luckily, Tim Vine tells the stupidest jokes of all.
We missed the warm up act, due to a sat nav malfunction (a letter will be going out to the Binatone complaints department for a partial refund). Fortunately, there was an experimental theatre troupe in the foyer performing an improv session about ‘da issues’, and this was highly entertaining. Admittedly, this troupe did consist of me and Dr Angel, but we do find ourselves extremely funny. It’s a gift.
Anyway, back to the real show. I didn’t really know what to expect from Mr Vine, other than tons of jokes. Well, there were certainly lots of jokes, but I didn’t foresee the barrage of wonderful surrealism and nonsense. If you were to take examples of individual jokes you’d probably think that they were rubbish, but somehow they all combine together to make a show of the utmost hilarity. Highlights included the song about a small piece of carpet and a jewellry box, his Bee Gees tribute and… well I could go on and on, and therefore ruin his act. Also none of it actually sounds that funny unless you were actually there. My advice is that you should just go and see him live, accept that he’s the daftest man on the planet and laugh your head off.
6 Feb
There’s always an extra edge when you play in a derby match, but the crucial thing today was for Liverpool to try and pick up all three points. Yes, I know it’s a cliché, but it also happens to be true.
Like all true derbies, there wasn’t a great deal of football played, but the Reds were certainly up for the fight. They were almost up for it too much when Kyrgiakos was sent off for a two-footed challenge after 34 minutes. There was no doubt that he deserved to receive the red card, but Pienaar should have probably been sent off a few minutes earlier for a reckless tackle on Mascherano. Liverpool managed to get to half-time without conceding and so were able to re-group.
The second half wasn’t as much of a challenge as you might have expected – Everton were toothless in attack. The Reds were able to take the lead on 55 minutes with a Dirk Kuyt header, from a set piece. This was quite staggering as Liverpool are woeful at set pieces. The fact that Kuyt was a yard from the line, in the middle of the goal, was surrounded by Howard and Neville, and didn’t jump, all just made the goal more unlikely.
From that point on, the result looked fairly comfortable – far more comfortable than Everton should have made it. Pienaar was eventually sent off, for a second booking, in injury time, and that was about it.
As I said at the start of the post, the three points were crucial, especially as Liverpool play Arsenal and Man City away in the next week. Fingers crossed for those matches, I suspect that they’re going to be a lot tougher than today.
4 Feb
This month’s Post Recycling will be extremely easy to write – I didn’t write any posts at all last February, so I have nothing to comment on. This was the start of my three month hiatus from both my blogs. A hiatus that has no real explanantion.
It seems weird now, considering how often that I currently blog, that I could go for so long without it. Was I just suffering a bit of blog fatigue or was I in the middle of an existential crisis? I honestly don’t know.
Part of the problem, I think, was that PSGOM was still over on Blogger, and I didn’t like how it worked. I know it’s a bit of a pathetic excuse, but it probably did rob me of some of my enthusiasm.
Anyway, I feel like I’ve made up for it since, with a six-month period of daily updates, that, ironically, only ended this week. I’ll be back with Post Recycling next month. If you have any ideas on what I can talk about, just let me know.
3 Feb
Ah, it’s the that time of the month. The time for some boring blog stats. Hold on to your hats – it’s going to be a crazy ride.
In December, the figures were:
The World of Sherby57 – Total hits = 846, average hits per day = 27.3
Pour Some Gravy On Me – Total hits = 1594, average hits per day = 51.4
In January, they were:
Sherby57 – Total hits = 1015, average hits per day = 32.7
PSGOM – Total hits = 1614, average hits per day = 52.1
Both blogs managed to beat their hits from last month. Whoopee. Sherby57 managed to get over a 1000 hits for the first time. I’m not entirely sure why reaching 1000 is significant, but it is. OK?
The increase in PSGOM hits has a lot to do with Mr Jonas Altberg aka Basshunter. His appearances in CBB generated 120 hits from the search terms: “jonas altberg sex tape”, “jonas altberg penis” and “jonas altberg cock”. Thanks for that, Jonas.
Top Posts for the Month
Have a butchers at these top posts. They really are most excellent. Honest.
Sherby57 –
Home Page – 197 hits
Genetic Engineering – Has It Gone Too Far? – 159 hits
Geordie Jokes – 50 hits
Sexy Lamb – 36 hits
PSGOM -
Home Page – 709 hits
Sex Sells: The Mr Banana Penis Story – 160 hits
CBB 2010: In They Go – 43 hits
CBB 2010: Day 5 and Live Shows – 37 hits
Top Posts of all time (so far)
The top posts of all time are exactly the same as last month, so I probably shouldn’t just publish them again. But I have.
Sherby57 -
Genetic Engineering – Has It Gone Too Far? – 2927 hits
Goot Crow Industries and Global Influence – 534 hits
Geordie Jeans – 453 hits
PSGOM –
Sex Sells: The Mr Banana Penis Story – 566 hits
The X Factor Finals: Week 7 – 117 hits
The X Factor Finals: Week 3 – 101 hits
1 Feb
It’s another week of goodies from the treasure trove of fun that is Sherby57:
Sunday 24th
When a Man met a Woman – A touching modern love story about when two people completely misunderstand each other.
Monday 25th
Skirting Board Girl – A Story – It’s a kind of updated version of Cinderella, in which a lovely but put-upon young lady is forced to sit on a skirting board.
Tuesday 26th
Bernard and the Conkers – A Story – A haunting tale about a man and a big pile of conkers.
Wednesday 27th
Dainty Feet – A short daydream about what I’d do if my feet were less caveman-like.
Thursday 28th
Paying Attention – A Story – Another moving story about a man, a woman and the perils of paying attention.
Friday 29th
There’s no post today. I know. It’s absolutely shocking. Sometimes even I need a rest.
Saturday 30th
The Dog Ate It – A somewhat florid explanation of why there was no post yesterday.
31 Jan
I’ll be honest with you: I don’t really like jokes. I know that sounds weird coming from someone who loves comedy, but they’re usually so tortured. I cringe when someone offers to tell me a joke, as I know that I probably won’t think it’s funny and so will have to either pretend to laugh, or look like a stony-faced arse. On occasion I tell people not to bother telling me a joke. It’s a bit of an affectation, but the sentiment is real.
So, it may surprise you to find out that this is the third year in a row that I’ve been to see gag-man extraordinaire, Jimmy Carr. While he’s never going to be a comedian that I truly love, he does provide you with one thing: Value For Money. In his 2-hour set, he rattles through well over 200 jokes, so there’s bound to be something that makes you laugh. That’s assuming that you’re not easily offended. He also delivers a brand-new show every year, which is more unusual than you might imagine. I know it doesn’t exactly sound like a ringing endorsement, but this is the third time that I’ve been to see him, so he must be doing something right.
Most of his jokes are based on questionable topics, but I think it’s clear that he’s uses taboos to get the maximum reaction, from a technical point of view, rather than him actually laughing at rape or disability. I can certainly understand how people wouldn’t find it acceptable and there are a few occasions where I think he oversteps the mark.
I don’t really have a lot more to add – if you like lots of jokes, go and watch him.
30 Jan
Do you remember the days when I’d spend Saturday afternoons frustratedly trying to get the match on an unreliable internet stream? They seem like such a distant memory.
This match report comes ‘live’ from me watching the potted highlights on Match of the Day. Which I’ve sky-plussed.
You can’t really tell how the game played out from such brief summaries, but it didn’t seem a vintage Reds performance. Dirk Kuyt gave Liverpool the lead in the first half as he bundled the ball in the back of the net. It wasn’t pretty but they all count.
The performance seemed to pick up in the second half, despite Ngog missing an open goal. The game was sealed on 70 minutes, when an Insua shot took a wicked deflection off Kevin Davies.
Liverpool’s league form hasn’t actually been that bad in the last 6 games, despite some lacklustre performances. Let’s hope that the quality of play now starts to improve.
30 Jan
So, Celebrity Big Brother is finally over and I no longer have to force myself to churn out daily updates. It’s like a massive weight has been lifted off my shoulders. Let’s get this whole thing over and done with.
With five housemates remaining there was always going to be a lot of padding and not much content. It’s strange that the conclusion to the series should be so inherently anti-climatic. This is my excuse for why this post is so short.
Day 26:
Vinnie moaned about not taking a part in the latest Rambo movie because it didn’t pay enough. He then mocked people for wearing clothes from Next. Alex picked him up on it, saying that he’d be losing votes. Vinnie was overly confident that he’d beat Alex. Hmmmm.
Errm. That was about it for Day 26.
Live Show:
I didn’t really have a favourite to win, mainly I just didn’t want it to be Vinnie because his ‘man of the people’ schtick was so disingenuous.
Stephanie was evicted first, and came fifth. They played the Dynasty theme tune as she left. How very droll.
The interview was perfunctory.
Jonas was evicted next. He seemed to forget how to speak English during the interview. I think he was just nervous and he was comically over-bullish about being over Katia. Despite some tough talk, you could tell that he was actually upset. He came across as a very genuine person.
Vinnie came third. He left to quite a few boos.
Dane came second. He also came across as a decent bloke and deserved to do well for the fake nightmare incident alone.
This, of course, meant that Alex won. Who would have thunk it? He seemed quite overwhelmed by winning, so I guess it’s good thing that he won, as it really meant a lot to him. Jordan got booed a lot though. Which was good.
And that was it. It’s been an enjoyable series overall, despite nothing overly dramatic happening. It’s a shame that there won’t be a series next year.
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